Within the hour my application will be at the Vancouver School Board office. After that, the ball is in their court - ain't much more I can do until *fingers crossed* interview time.

While photocopying my undergrad transcripts for my application, I learned that I graduated on the dean's list. Funny that I never knew till now, but doesn't actually make much of a difference I suppose.

next step...

if you haven't yet, go check out amir's broken laptop that he sold on ebay

The time has finally come - VSB application time. All in all, I feel pretty good about my prospects, thought I have begun thinking about possibly applying to another couple of districts that I've heard really good things about, but really, first thing's first, and Vancouver is really where I want to teach the most. Thei application process is a bit on the involved side - 4 page application, resume, cover letter, copies of all our reports and transcripts (um, like almost 20 pages of text...), 2 confidential references, and so forth. Yeugh. So that's my project for the weekend, alongside the usual heaps of reading which I, for some strange reason, actually seem to enjoy most of (perhaps I'm in the right field...), and designing a "qualitative self-assessment" for my assessment class. Boy-o, I sure do live the glamour.

It is almost hilarious how quickly many of my classmates have reverted from teacher to bad student - arriving late, talking in class, ignoring the teacher (okay, professor), skipping classes, not doing readings or homework, and so forth. While I am glad to be a student again (it's fun in that weird, sick way mmmmnewideas) and it's nice to be around adults for a change (okay, or close approximations of adults) and have someone else be responsible for keeping classes progressing, I still don't feel the need to be a jackass about it. Plus, some part of me always remembers how much I'm paying to be here, even though the number is so big I try not to think about it consciously.

Yesterday I lost my "one thing that had imporved with Harper as PM," that being his proximity to me - Ottawa's a long way's away - but yesterday he had the nerve to come to town. If I hadn't been at a forum at the school board, I would have been heckling/planning to kidnap and brainwash him for sure. He has just cut off all communicfation with the press corps in Ottawa claiming that they have a liberal bias, and I can only hope that they eat him alive the same way the Washington corps did to Clinton when he tokk similar but FAR less extreme actions. Sad thing is, with the Libs in shambles and the good ol' guys in orange not exactly mobilizing to fill the gap, the neocons from Alberta are in the best spot possible, and there's even buzz that they might be thinking along the lines of an election since they could probably secure a majority, given a lack of opposition.

Words of caution people: minority governments are very constrained in what they have to do. They must forge agreement among different interests, and moderate their views. The same cannot be said of a majority government. Here in Canada we give an extreme amount of power to majority governments - let's remeber, they make up both the exectutive and legislative branches of our government, and thus have carte blanche to do whateveer they wish. Haper's government has not proven that they're safe or trustworthy just because the sky didn't fall in when they formed a minority government. If they are given a majority, thing will be very different.

Not that I thnk my advice will sway those inclined to the type of actions I caution against, but at least then it's on paper (or some string of 1s and 0s somewhere) that I did warn people.

I want to smuggle George Stroumboulopoulos out fo the country and steal his job. I want my own CBC hour every night.

okay, let's see... where do we stand inturnet? I used to post pictures and random art and the occasional political rant, but in the past while, this has all gone downhill. I don't have the right software on this computer (my mom's laptop, aka. the temporary replacement after motherboard death) to post pictures anymore and I guess I just haven't had much patience for writing. This (for now) ends here.

In other words, have some content internet!

But I don't promise that my content will be any less random than I am!

Here's my favorite quote from one of my practicum final reports: "As a role model in the classroom, Sasha epitomizes communicative clarity."

Mmmepitomizes.

I'm starting to wrap my head around getting my application in to the Vancouver School Board. I think my aim is to spend next year subbing so I get a chance to test the district waters while having a markedly less insane workload. The problem is, I can't quite believe that any of this is real. I don't even know what it looks like to have your shit together - the idea of being completely self-reliant, sans student loan funds or any other kind of net, by the middle of August is daunting at best. Then, there's the dauntingness factor of the whole getting a career and a life thing. Yeah. I'm going to do what I always do - grit my teeth, put my head down, and pretend to believe that I can handle all of this.

And, on a completely unrelated note, I've come across another meme that will make a good forum for my own venting/ranting, so here it is: 10 things that I care deeply about, and for contrast sake, 10 things I couldn't even be paid to care about.

10 things I care about, deeply, passionately, randomly, and so on (in relatively random order):

1. the violation of basic human rights by exploitative labour practices
2. violence against women
3. systemic racism against (among other groups) indigenous peoples in Canada
4. the state and quality of our public school system (I want that Minister of Education job SO DAMNED BADLY!!)
5. okay, this should have been #1, I concede. My brilliant, beautiful family whom I literally couldn't live without
6. the woodwards re-development - I so wish I could afford to buy in. Best new housing development in this city in so long. It's just so rare to have the chance to put your money where your mouth is and support a project that is at the same time socially, politically, and environmentally progressive (even if it ain't perfect by a long shot)
7. teaching young people to be critical media consumers instead of passive information-receiving intellectual wastelands.
8. Canada's ongoing failure to take Kyoto, or global warming more generally, serious enough to warrant actual policy
9. helping Canadians become politically savvy enough to actually demand better governance and politicians
10. fair trade

10 things that are completely not worth a single iota of my time or attention and I wouldn't give a flying shit about if you paid me:
1. obtaining material goods to impress others
2. whether SUV driving Americans will always have cheap and easy access to enough dead dinosaurs to fuel their desire to run over everyone else (figuratively, of course)
3. fashion trends
4. celebrities and other empty-headed arseholes we're supposed to pay attention to (excepting of course people like Angelina Joli, Jon Stewart, and Steven Colbert who actually use their powers for good)
5. living in the right "zipcode" or income bracket to be "socially acceptable"
6. petty infighting in the republican party
7. who anyone (Clinton, gay people, my mom, your mom, Lindsay Lohan, etc.) has sex with (unless it's children, in which case I might actually support mob justice)
8. survivor/american idol/random trendy TV shite
9. doing what others think I ought to, if it conflicts with what I believe is right
10. avian flu. yeah, you heard me. I'm the girl who lived through the chicken pox 4 times. bring it on, foul fowl.

I'm going to call that content for the day. Are you content? Maybe I'll go do some reading now.

I don't know just exactly what it is - stress, transition, anxiety... - but I'm stuck in this funk. It's been a good couple of weeks now actually, and all I want to do is lay on the couch and sleep. I feel like such the opposite of my usual proactive self. I mean, I'm going through the motions during the day - school, errands, family, whatever - but on some deeper level I just feel tired and, well, that's the part I don't know. Tired and what? Melancholy? Not quite. Apathetic? Fatigued? Discontented? I just can't quite put my finger on it. When I come home at the end of the day, I can barely convince myself to do any school work, cook dinner, do dishes, even hop in the shower. I just feel so demotivated, but I'm not sure why. On some level, everything is peachy - I'm doing what I want to do, and you'd think that would be exciting, but something's not connecting. I end up just wanting to disengage.

I think it certainly doesn't help that there's no corner of the future that I can take refuge in. No room for manouvering, no rest for the wicked, and so forth. I'll be in school all summer, and not only should I be applying for teaching jobs in the fall, but I should also be seriously thinking about finding some kind of job right now. Otherwise, I'm not sure this whole summer will happen at all. But I'm not. And when I think about it, I just want to cry. I can't even expalin it to myself, let alone anyone else, so I've been trying to hide it but sonner or later it's going to start showing whether I like it or not. Or maybe it won't, just because I started to think that it might be a good thing if it did, because then it might make sense to someone.

I don't think any of this actually makes any sense, but at least maybe this explains why even post-practicum this blog continues to be neglected. I'm just way too... something.

as much as I hate internet explorer (and oh how I do) it does have at least one use: when you first fire up a fresh install and need to get online to download a decent browser.

firesomething is my new favorite toy - I'm currently using Mozilla Lightning Deer. Awsome.

See what happens when I have time off?

I never have the time or energy to write the things I think I'm going to write here. I suppose I just vastly prefer real to digital - it's sunny out, how can I possibly justify spending more time typing?

I'm finally free - ish, but still marking away and trying to get all the life-stuff together. Today: gr. 11 english tests, house cleaning, grocery shopping, and laundry. Oh the glamour. All I really feel like doing is sleeping - in the sun ideally.

Sitting on my ass blogging at school. This is the sweeteness known as phase-out! My last day is Friday, so I'm marking away, but other than that, I don't have much left. One more test to give this afternoon, pro-d day conferences tomorrow, poetry performances and an earthquake drill on Thursday, and then on Friday, the ever strenuous class party with my grade 8s. I have been led to belive that the school is throwing us a party after school on Friday, complete with on-premise booze provided by the school. Yay tax dollars! I suppose there must be some staff social slush fund that it comes out of.

I got my final report at the end of last week, and it is nothing short of glowing, so all's set for me to become a real, bonafide teacher next year!

Right now, I'm sitting in class watching my sponsor's lit 12 class write a test while she is away at camp with the mini school. I have taken over the room in he rabsence, which has been good times all around - posting studnet work on the walls, and, as you can see, making myself at home on her computer.

Soon, I will sleep. For a week.

Mom and Davdi's wedding last weekend was so beautiful - with any luck I'll get to see pictures soon.

I suppose I'd better get back to work - BC Economy projects don't mark themselves!

Mood: indifferent (yeah, I just don't care!)
Music: the scritch of pencils
Snack: BBQ corn chips